Monday, August 14, 2006
I found this post I wrote August 2004. Two years ago.
And here I am still...At the point I wrote this post I was in the best shape I've ever been in. The problem was that I had reached a plateau because I wasn't eating right. And...now...I can see that I just let it go at about this point. I stayed right at the same place for about a year because I wasn't eating right, but I was working out all the time. Then I stopped working out last year and I have gained back everything. I'm stuck. Stagnant. And now I can see that I've been that way for about 2 years.
I think I can, I think I can . . . This is so ridiculous!!! I have spent so much money to have a trainer, and really I have nothing to show for it. I have been in the same place for at least the last 6 months. I went to two buffets with Josh yesterday! Going to the gym is not a problem...I love it...it's trying to break old eating habits that is the hard part, but even that is not so difficult. The difficult part comes in trying not to let food be a "social event". I don't want to eat out!!! And people everywhere keep asking me if I want to!! I'm a big girl and I can say no, but it's so hard when people are contantly asking if you want to go to lunch and stuff so that they have something to do that day. You don't offer heroin to a recovering junkie, and you shouldn't offer food to a food addict either! Where's the support. People just don't understand because everyone is also caught up in their own food addictions and their own issues. I'm tired of getting comments like "eating out won't kill you every now and then", "live a little", "you can eat right starting next week", "that's all you're going to eat", "oh I feel so bad for you", or anything else along those lines. Eating right is not a punishment!! You don't overload your car with oil or gas or anything else. You give it what it needs when it needs it. It's the same thing with your body...food is fuel for your body to move! And that's all. It is not a social event, it is not something you do for fun!!! And why is it so hard for everyone to understand, why is it considered weird that I want to do what's good for my body in the RIGHT way, and why are people so unsupportive? Just leave me alone when it comes to my eating habits!!! Don't look at me weird...Don't say anything about it...and definitely quit asking me to go eat for a Saturday afternoon activity. I do so well when I'm by myself during the week, and as soon as I have to "do" some kind of interaction with other people...food is the number one priority!Ugh...I'm just tired of this. I want to reach my goal. It's amazing to me how unsupportive people are when it comes to fitness and health. I have tons of support for trying to finish up school...but this whole fitness thing is actually a lot more important to me than that...and support? forget it. It's no where to be found...
I think I can, I think I can . . . This is so ridiculous!!! I have spent so much money to have a trainer, and really I have nothing to show for it. I have been in the same place for at least the last 6 months. I went to two buffets with Josh yesterday! Going to the gym is not a problem...I love it...it's trying to break old eating habits that is the hard part, but even that is not so difficult. The difficult part comes in trying not to let food be a "social event". I don't want to eat out!!! And people everywhere keep asking me if I want to!! I'm a big girl and I can say no, but it's so hard when people are contantly asking if you want to go to lunch and stuff so that they have something to do that day. You don't offer heroin to a recovering junkie, and you shouldn't offer food to a food addict either! Where's the support. People just don't understand because everyone is also caught up in their own food addictions and their own issues. I'm tired of getting comments like "eating out won't kill you every now and then", "live a little", "you can eat right starting next week", "that's all you're going to eat", "oh I feel so bad for you", or anything else along those lines. Eating right is not a punishment!! You don't overload your car with oil or gas or anything else. You give it what it needs when it needs it. It's the same thing with your body...food is fuel for your body to move! And that's all. It is not a social event, it is not something you do for fun!!! And why is it so hard for everyone to understand, why is it considered weird that I want to do what's good for my body in the RIGHT way, and why are people so unsupportive? Just leave me alone when it comes to my eating habits!!! Don't look at me weird...Don't say anything about it...and definitely quit asking me to go eat for a Saturday afternoon activity. I do so well when I'm by myself during the week, and as soon as I have to "do" some kind of interaction with other people...food is the number one priority!Ugh...I'm just tired of this. I want to reach my goal. It's amazing to me how unsupportive people are when it comes to fitness and health. I have tons of support for trying to finish up school...but this whole fitness thing is actually a lot more important to me than that...and support? forget it. It's no where to be found...
